Growth

Why True Allies Are an Essential Piece in Your Way to Fulfillment

4 min read

We need true allies to survive. I love History, and World War II is one of my favorite topics. There you can learn how vital true allies are. I love this Cambridge Dictionary’s definition of ally: “someone who helps and supports someone else.” Support. That’s what we need in our lives. Solitude may work for […]

We need true allies to survive.

I love History, and World War II is one of my favorite topics.

There you can learn how vital true allies are.

I love this Cambridge Dictionary’s definition of ally: “someone who helps and supports someone else.”

Support. That’s what we need in our lives.

Solitude may work for other species. Not for human beings. Not for me. Not for you.

“Nobody’s perfect, but a team can be.”
— Meredith Belbin

You need someone by your side to feel complete.

There is no point in seeking meaning in life in solitude.

We’re not so selfish as we may think. This Live Science’s article states that:

Psychological research suggests the opposite: that self-interest is far from people’s primary motivation. In fact, humans are prone to act for the good of the group, many studies have found.

” In the past 20 years, we have discovered that people — all around the world — are a lot more moral and a lot less selfish than economists and evolutionary biologists had previously assumed, and that our moral commitments are surprisingly similar: to reciprocity, fairness and helping people in need, even if acting on these motives can be personally costly for a person,” Samuel Bowles, an economist at the Santa Fe Institute and author of “The Moral Economy: Why Good Incentives Are No Substitute for Good Citizens” (Yale University Press, 2016).

What a true ally gives you

A true ally will be that person:

  • who listens to you when nobody else does,
  • who helps you when you really need it,
  • who forgives you when you don’t even deserve it.

A true ally puts your interest above his or her own.

A true ally accepts your inappropriate responses and attitudes.

A true ally is a gift of which you are usually unaware.

Because you, as a human being, take many things in life for granted.

The risks you take if you don’t take care of your true allies

You won’t have many true allies in your life, so you’d better carefully take care of them starting today, right now.

You don’t need to wait to receive a cancer diagnosis from a man in a white gown to start appreciating your true allies.

You don’t need to wait for your parents’ funeral to regret not spending more time with them.

You don’t have to start valuing your partner when he/she breaks up with you.

Why is tragedy the only trigger to wake up from your selfish dream???

It shouldn’t be that way.

You should never wait until you lose things to start appreciating them.

That’s why you should take care of your true allies before drama knocks on your door.

Everybody has a limit. There’s a limit to patience. There’s a limit to comprehension. There’s a limit to waiting. There’s a limit to life.

Maybe someday they won’t be here, by your side, when you need them the most.

Seeing and feeling these future scenarios is how you learn to appreciate your present.

Who are your true allies

I say it again. True allies are not everywhere. In fact, you will have very few of them.

I will list 5 of them so that you can focus much more attention on them today, now.

1. Your partner.

She/he supports you 24 hours a day.

That’s not an easy job. You know it.

Coexistence is not easy. Many times you’re not as calm as oil on a plate.

She/he is the one who lives your day-to-day life, with its bad days and its worst ones.

2. Your parents.

What parents do for their children is not known until you become a parent.

It’s sad, but it usually goes that way, generation by generation.

Pay attention to them. Think about what they did for you. Think what you can do for them today, now.

Maybe they’re telling you the same stories every day. Think they listened to yours even more.

3. A friend who’s always there.

Think about that friend who’s always available to have a coffee with you, even if it turns his schedule upside down.

The one who always answers your call. The one whose phone’s never busy. Never out of range.

The one that never looks the other way.

4. Your dog.

Sometimes humans are not the answer. Only dog owners can understand this.

He’s the one and only that is by your side, no matter what happens, no matter how badly you acted towards him.

5. Time.

There are true allies far beyond people or animals. For this reason, you don’t take them into account.

Time can become one of your best true allies in your life. Pay attention to it. Take care of it.

Concepts as critical as compound interest are based primarily on time.

Time is how you can achieve your long-term goals, those you care about, those that are critical to you.

Takeaways

Be careful how you treat your true allies:

  • Never reply badly to them.
  • Take care of them.
  • Assume their errors.
  • Accept when they bother or annoy you.

Two last takeaways:

  1. Avoid regret. It’s one of the worst feelings in life because it usually lasts for a lifetime. Take action today, now.
  2. Your true allies won’t be all your life supporting you, coping with your bad answers or attitudes. Everyone has a limit. Don’t try to tighten the thumbscrews too much. Be flexible, comprehensive. Look always for dialogue, consensus, and meeting points.

It’s by sharing your life with your true allies how you’ll find the way to fulfillment. There’s no other way.

Photo at the top courtesy of JOSHUA COLEMAN on Unsplash.